`A mixed up world. Messed Up.

Friday, May 30, 2008 ♥

11:54 PM

MOVED TO:

ZAIMAHZAINI.BLOGSPOT.COM :D

Thursday, May 8, 2008 ♥

9:42 PM

This is my last post. I'm sick of all this, iI'm so tired of having no privacy in life and im sick of handling all that and getting hurt and evil people who have to handle with the good ones. Screw life.

-end. Goodbye. I love you readers.

Monday, May 5, 2008 ♥

4:52 AM

A lot in my mind lately. Nope, not the headless rat i shockingly stared at this morning that caused me to scream and run all the way to the other staircase. Nope, not that. Not even 'cause my mother scolded me because i refuse to get new pair of shoes because both of my school shoes is flab open and you can practically see my white socks:)

..and no, not because I told Marcus I feel extra-fat and cause he cheats when he plays Tic-Tac-Toe.

Lately; So much running around my mind. I'm heart-broken at some particular moments. I hurt myself, I haven't been spending time with the people that's important in my life, the people i love. What bothers me alot is, Nazura is going to fly off to Australia, for good. Badul is flying off to New York, for good. God knows where the others are going to go. Sometimes, I feel like breaking down and cry. But come to think about it, my friends brought me up to be strong. My family pulled me all the way up when I fall. What's the point of giving people courage when you, yourself are going to fall down, right? As much as I want to inspire you all, I'm not as strong as you think. I break down and cry easily. But I'm described as the happy-crazy-hyper girl who laughs like the world is going to end, such a happy-happy girl, and If that how I inspire people, I'm going to be that way. I promise myself to make people around me smile before I even make myself smile. I'll make sure the people around me feel loved around me though i bully them. I'll make sure I don't hurt anyone. Around me, friends are growing up so fast. Life gets more difficult. Complicated love life. School rules piles up and gets more each second. Discipline gets tougher. Friends are hard to handle as they get mature. Racism and prejudice. As far as I know, my posts always don't make sense and that goes to this one. P/s: I love you. And I always will. But now, I'm heart-broken.

I need English Literature.
Laughter,please!
G'night.
(L)

Friday, April 25, 2008 ♥

8:04 AM

It's 11:05. Can't sleep. Here loves, i blog. Be happy, "cause life doesn't owe us anything; as a matter of fact, we owe something to the world." Love. Description? No perfect definition for it, love changes. Love is painful, ain't it sometimes? When someone tries to get in the way. Or when you know there's someone for him/her in his/her heart. Or when someone tries to stop it. When someone makes up bad news about your love. Or even, when you're confused about it. But, when the feeling is true and when not even a word can describe it. Not even a test can prove it. I don't think you should be afraid of your love for you love, you know. I don't think there's any reason for you to break down or take the nasty words people judge about your love. I don't think there's need to be scared to fight for your love. Or to be afraid to stand up for it. Cause you know, true love does exist deep inside somewhere, and you have to search for it. Don't let people take that away from you, don't let people bring you to the bottom cause what people say doesn't matter, what pulls you back up is all love. It's good to cry your heart out once in a while. Cry it all out. Let the pain of love escapes. Don't love some one just because, love them for a reason and let the reason be love. Love strikes, and it happens to be a wonderful thing, ecstatic yet so indescribable. The moments when you are so happy that you sing in the shower, or even sing a-long to a cheesy music. Or the love letters you write makes no meaning at all. Or when you twirl your hair but end up messing it. Love is happy. Love is wonderful. Love is tears of joy. Love is the amazing rain that you receive on cozy Sunday afternoon. Love is the night with thousand of stars. Love don't do a thing but sing to us in our heart. Love, the way he laugh. The way he laugh along with us even though he knows that our jokes don't make sense. The way he look into our eyes and smile. The way he talks about you to his friends. The way he grabs your hand and plays with it. The way he mess up your hair and wants to cuddle you up. The way he appears from the back, suddenly. The way he fix his tie every morning. The way he talks to you. Simple, everything. Everything from him is love. Smile, ev-one!

- My post do not make sense. And pictures up soon/or longer! : )

Goodnight.
I'm happy.
Thanks for asking!

Friday, April 4, 2008 ♥

7:01 AM

G's BACK. And I definitely LOVE, LSW :)

GOOODNIGHT!
xo.

Thursday, April 3, 2008 ♥

9:12 AM

Don't ask me why I'm blogging this, I, myself don't know the reason why. I'm in this cozy room, thinking. wondering. day-dreaming away. I'm done with crying. I'm good in pretending. This whole thing, might just fade away in a blink. That's what I'm afraid of, your words and your deep-down feelings. It might disappear. In one second, so much can happen. and if that happens, what would I'm left with? I cried like a little girl sitting in the corner thinking about that. What if-- this things change? What if you walk out? What if you turn around without telling? What if I fall and nobody is there to pick me up? What if i have no one to run to? What if i've no one to face? What if you fell in love.. again? What if.

I miss you alot today.
and i don't want you to leave.

Monday, March 31, 2008 ♥

6:14 AM

"I just wish someone would--shoot me from that building cause my tummy is hurting!"

Okay, School was school. That was a line I said to myself in Physics class and Blessy, Amal and Alvin heard me and they were all hahahahahaha why. I just lay my head on the table. I wasn't being as happy as Im suppose to be like in First term, or in Weeli's word-- Putting back the smiles on my friends face. I couldn't be bothered to fool/joke around cause my tummy was the reason! Yeah, screw you beeeeeeetch. Forget that, erase it. Here's the thing:

I find today, awesomely amazing day of March hahaha I'm serious. The fact that my two closestfriends stayed with me until afternoon to hang, Thank you SereneSeah and JiaChee. Serene was there the whole time to watch the scene hahaha you geeeeeets! Pictures are not in my phone, so I'll post it up soon, no promises. And cause my mister six-packs was there to hang with me. Until 440pm. It was all dull and so--quiet at first, but it turned out to be the most wonderful afternoon of my life. Even when the crowd came: Ryan, Heng, Aaron, Sing Haw, Brice and some others like 'Wilson and Erny' : )) Things for Gette to update herself since, she wants to know what my boy and I did: He came to class at 1245:) Yeah, we walked and talked like the usuals, went to canteen. And two of the Bests people joined us, and it was awkward at the beginning, but we managed to go through:) This one best girl left, and so theres another one left, yeah you're wondering who but I think you know who. We were clueless so, we went to the library.. and yeah things--happened! and we went down and we held hands : )))) we hang with the crowd.. and yeah time passed, and he was still holding my hands, and he was the most amazing thing ive ever seen :) the way he look, the way he talk, the way he.. okay enough! hahahaha. and it was time for me to go home by 440, cause I saw my car, and left Ryan with this Best girl and I gave him a peck on the cheek and he sent me to my car, as he walk, before I went into the car, he whispered," I love you." which I think my mom could read : )))) hahahahaha. and cause mom was asking, who was the boy with you just now ah? :D

And then.. I went to tuition. Back to my normal life. And.. I'm starting to miss you again.

-Baby you've got a smile so bright, you know you couldve been a candle :))
Goodnight poundervul vevol.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxo!

Saturday, March 29, 2008 ♥

5:12 AM

I'm still alive, yay!

I know how you feel.Everyone is stressed out cause' of me not blogging. Especially Gette, Shan Wee, Weeli, Joann and the rest of the world.I feel so loved hahaha okay I joke:) Are you happy now? Yeah, I blogged. And I won't write as much, cause theres pictures, and I feel such pig to write now :)) Now, truthfully, I miss my boy. MY wonderful boy. I learnt today, that he is strong to face through crestfallen moments. And no matter what, he have me. Doesn't it makes you feel complete when the people you love is all around you? I do. Holiday sucks. What's the fun of waking up late, pigging out, watch television, sitting like an idiot being damn clueless? I need school. I need laughters. I need my friends. And I need G to get her ass back to Goo' ol' Brunei. I want Sunday to pass and skip to Monday 8)

I love this line:
"Haley: The good news is you did better and the bad news is better is a "D".
Nathan: Yeah I guess I didn't really give this one my best shot.
Haley: What's going on with you?
Nathan: Well you know me and Peyton broke up.
Haley: Peyton and I.
Nathan: Well she broke up with you too? I didn't know she was going to take it this hard. She went off on Brooke at practice. I'm kinda worried about her.
Haley: Well maybe you should have worried about her more when you were together. I'm sorry, but come on it's true.
Nathan: No you don't know the first thing about Peyton and I.
Haley: Ahem... me and Peyton.
Nathan: Whatever. "

---One Tree Hill.

As promised, I posted up the pictures I promised G. This is my day out with my bestfriend/closefriends. Always better with them: