A mixed up world.

2008-05-30T23:54:00.000-07:00

MOVED TO:

ZAIMAHZAINI.BLOGSPOT.COM :D

2008-05-08T21:42:00.000-07:00

This is my last post. I'm sick of all this, iI'm so tired of having no privacy in life and im sick of handling all that and getting hurt and evil people who have to handle with the good ones. Screw life.

-end. Goodbye. I love you readers.

2008-05-05T04:52:00.000-07:00

A lot in my mind lately. Nope, not the headless rat i shockingly stared at this morning that caused me to scream and run all the way to the other staircase. Nope, not that. Not even 'cause my mother scolded me because i refuse to get new pair of shoes because both of my school shoes is flab open and you can practically see my white socks:)

..and no, not because I told Marcus I feel extra-fat and cause he cheats when he plays Tic-Tac-Toe.

Lately; So much running around my mind. I'm heart-broken at some particular moments. I hurt myself, I haven't been spending time with the people that's important in my life, the people i love. What bothers me alot is, Nazura is going to fly off to Australia, for good. Badul is flying off to New York, for good. God knows where the others are going to go. Sometimes, I feel like breaking down and cry. But come to think about it, my friends brought me up to be strong. My family pulled me all the way up when I fall. What's the point of giving people courage when you, yourself are going to fall down, right? As much as I want to inspire you all, I'm not as strong as you think. I break down and cry easily. But I'm described as the happy-crazy-hyper girl who laughs like the world is going to end, such a happy-happy girl, and If that how I inspire people, I'm going to be that way. I promise myself to make people around me smile before I even make myself smile. I'll make sure the people around me feel loved around me though i bully them. I'll make sure I don't hurt anyone. Around me, friends are growing up so fast. Life gets more difficult. Complicated love life. School rules piles up and gets more each second. Discipline gets tougher. Friends are hard to handle as they get mature. Racism and prejudice. As far as I know, my posts always don't make sense and that goes to this one. P/s: I love you. And I always will. But now, I'm heart-broken.

I need English Literature.
Laughter,please!
G'night.
(L)

2008-04-25T08:04:00.000-07:00

It's 11:05. Can't sleep. Here loves, i blog. Be happy, "cause life doesn't owe us anything; as a matter of fact, we owe something to the world." Love. Description? No perfect definition for it, love changes. Love is painful, ain't it sometimes? When someone tries to get in the way. Or when you know there's someone for him/her in his/her heart. Or when someone tries to stop it. When someone makes up bad news about your love. Or even, when you're confused about it. But, when the feeling is true and when not even a word can describe it. Not even a test can prove it. I don't think you should be afraid of your love for you love, you know. I don't think there's any reason for you to break down or take the nasty words people judge about your love. I don't think there's need to be scared to fight for your love. Or to be afraid to stand up for it. Cause you know, true love does exist deep inside somewhere, and you have to search for it. Don't let people take that away from you, don't let people bring you to the bottom cause what people say doesn't matter, what pulls you back up is all love. It's good to cry your heart out once in a while. Cry it all out. Let the pain of love escapes. Don't love some one just because, love them for a reason and let the reason be love. Love strikes, and it happens to be a wonderful thing, ecstatic yet so indescribable. The moments when you are so happy that you sing in the shower, or even sing a-long to a cheesy music. Or the love letters you write makes no meaning at all. Or when you twirl your hair but end up messing it. Love is happy. Love is wonderful. Love is tears of joy. Love is the amazing rain that you receive on cozy Sunday afternoon. Love is the night with thousand of stars. Love don't do a thing but sing to us in our heart. Love, the way he laugh. The way he laugh along with us even though he knows that our jokes don't make sense. The way he look into our eyes and smile. The way he talks about you to his friends. The way he grabs your hand and plays with it. The way he mess up your hair and wants to cuddle you up. The way he appears from the back, suddenly. The way he fix his tie every morning. The way he talks to you. Simple, everything. Everything from him is love. Smile, ev-one!

- My post do not make sense. And pictures up soon/or longer! : )

Goodnight.
I'm happy.
Thanks for asking!

2008-04-04T07:01:00.000-07:00

G's BACK. And I definitely LOVE, LSW :)

GOOODNIGHT!
xo.

2008-04-03T09:12:00.000-07:00

Don't ask me why I'm blogging this, I, myself don't know the reason why. I'm in this cozy room, thinking. wondering. day-dreaming away. I'm done with crying. I'm good in pretending. This whole thing, might just fade away in a blink. That's what I'm afraid of, your words and your deep-down feelings. It might disappear. In one second, so much can happen. and if that happens, what would I'm left with? I cried like a little girl sitting in the corner thinking about that. What if-- this things change? What if you walk out? What if you turn around without telling? What if I fall and nobody is there to pick me up? What if i have no one to run to? What if i've no one to face? What if you fell in love.. again? What if.

I miss you alot today.
and i don't want you to leave.

2008-03-31T06:14:00.000-07:00

"I just wish someone would--shoot me from that building cause my tummy is hurting!"

Okay, School was school. That was a line I said to myself in Physics class and Blessy, Amal and Alvin heard me and they were all hahahahahaha why. I just lay my head on the table. I wasn't being as happy as Im suppose to be like in First term, or in Weeli's word-- Putting back the smiles on my friends face. I couldn't be bothered to fool/joke around cause my tummy was the reason! Yeah, screw you beeeeeeetch. Forget that, erase it. Here's the thing:

I find today, awesomely amazing day of March hahaha I'm serious. The fact that my two closestfriends stayed with me until afternoon to hang, Thank you SereneSeah and JiaChee. Serene was there the whole time to watch the scene hahaha you geeeeeets! Pictures are not in my phone, so I'll post it up soon, no promises. And cause my mister six-packs was there to hang with me. Until 440pm. It was all dull and so--quiet at first, but it turned out to be the most wonderful afternoon of my life. Even when the crowd came: Ryan, Heng, Aaron, Sing Haw, Brice and some others like 'Wilson and Erny' : )) Things for Gette to update herself since, she wants to know what my boy and I did: He came to class at 1245:) Yeah, we walked and talked like the usuals, went to canteen. And two of the Bests people joined us, and it was awkward at the beginning, but we managed to go through:) This one best girl left, and so theres another one left, yeah you're wondering who but I think you know who. We were clueless so, we went to the library.. and yeah things--happened! and we went down and we held hands : )))) we hang with the crowd.. and yeah time passed, and he was still holding my hands, and he was the most amazing thing ive ever seen :) the way he look, the way he talk, the way he.. okay enough! hahahaha. and it was time for me to go home by 440, cause I saw my car, and left Ryan with this Best girl and I gave him a peck on the cheek and he sent me to my car, as he walk, before I went into the car, he whispered," I love you." which I think my mom could read : )))) hahahahaha. and cause mom was asking, who was the boy with you just now ah? :D

And then.. I went to tuition. Back to my normal life. And.. I'm starting to miss you again.

-Baby you've got a smile so bright, you know you couldve been a candle :))
Goodnight poundervul vevol.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxo!

2008-03-29T05:12:00.000-07:00

I'm still alive, yay!

I know how you feel.Everyone is stressed out cause' of me not blogging. Especially Gette, Shan Wee, Weeli, Joann and the rest of the world.I feel so loved hahaha okay I joke:) Are you happy now? Yeah, I blogged. And I won't write as much, cause theres pictures, and I feel such pig to write now :)) Now, truthfully, I miss my boy. MY wonderful boy. I learnt today, that he is strong to face through crestfallen moments. And no matter what, he have me. Doesn't it makes you feel complete when the people you love is all around you? I do. Holiday sucks. What's the fun of waking up late, pigging out, watch television, sitting like an idiot being damn clueless? I need school. I need laughters. I need my friends. And I need G to get her ass back to Goo' ol' Brunei. I want Sunday to pass and skip to Monday 8)

I love this line:
"Haley: The good news is you did better and the bad news is better is a "D".
Nathan: Yeah I guess I didn't really give this one my best shot.
Haley: What's going on with you?
Nathan: Well you know me and Peyton broke up.
Haley: Peyton and I.
Nathan: Well she broke up with you too? I didn't know she was going to take it this hard. She went off on Brooke at practice. I'm kinda worried about her.
Haley: Well maybe you should have worried about her more when you were together. I'm sorry, but come on it's true.
Nathan: No you don't know the first thing about Peyton and I.
Haley: Ahem... me and Peyton.
Nathan: Whatever. "

---One Tree Hill.

As promised, I posted up the pictures I promised G. This is my day out with my bestfriend/closefriends. Always better with them:

and P/s: I fell in love with this awesome chinese boy : )))

Good night, wonderfuls.
xxxxxxxxxxxxo!

2008-03-12T23:41:00.000-07:00

Here I am, not keeping my promises to G. Haven't upload the pictures cause my Laptop got carried away by mom. It had viruses, I don't know why and had to be fix, immediately. So G, I promise I'll upload the pictures when the Laptop comes back to me:)

Currently: In my mom's office.
Music : Footsteps.
Mood : Mixed up.

Hellllllllllo! One word for now-- rumour. I don't get it, well I don't understand why people live their life making up rumours. I mean, uhm, don't you have your life to worry about? Jobless people, I call people like this.. sad. I'm sorry, but I'm just saying. I've notice that people curse each other, tagged on one's blog, spread rumours about one another around the school. I just want to know.. why? Though I am not the victim and I may sound so, "God, This girl talk so much. Cannot Shut up is it?" It's just so rude. That's a harsh word. I think the people who spread it around deserve that one simple word. Put yourself in the victim's shoes. What would you feel? How would you react? Yeah, It's fun to make fun of people. It's releasing to laugh at people, but for once.. grow up and use your brain. There's this word, karma. Yeah, think about it hard before you open your mouth and talk bad about people. You're a human being. You're God's creation. What's so different about you and the others? You call them ugly, then you yourself are calling yourself ugly. You have one nose, pair of eyes, one mouth, same things like the others. What differences do you have from the others that make you so "perfect"? In the end, you yourself will suffer. You've feel the feeling of getting hurt, humiliated, embarrass. That's how exactly how they felt when just one word came to them. If you hurt one people's feeling now, sooner or later, one of them who you love will feel what the people you made fun of felt. Think.

I'm not mad, or angry. Just stating the obvious. Well anyway, moving on. I don't want to talk so much about that. Grown up people can think for themselves. If not, go call yourself a kid : ) And a girl called me some name today, I'm a happy person.. so why should I care? Girl, atleast I don't look like a suh-lut :)

Again, HI. My days have been occupied by,mostly,studying lately. Classes, Tuition, ELit, French and so on so on. Tuition was not bad last night. I think I improved a little since Mr.Chang asked me to move to the front. Would have done much better for Assessment Test. Sigh. Bryantozozo and I got married last night, and none of my friends or his came except for Wanting and Paul (he was late!) hahahaha. okay, you might think this is serious, but no, it's all a joke. It's how we act in school. But we got married right before tuition, he he he. Same afternoon, got married with Willie! hahahahaha. sucha bitch:) I like school lately. Actually I love being in saint andrew's. The feelings are way different from the feelings I felt at any other place. My school, my friends make me smile. make me laugh. Actually, all of them are fun to be with, each and every single one of them cause they know howta make me smile and go through my day. They Always make my day :) I have the spirit to go school everyday. hahaha, serious. wait.. oh my god.

GOT TO GO!

Running late for Eng Lit class. hahahaha.

I'll write some more when I get my laptop back!

None other than;

Have a Wonferful zaaaay!

XO.

2008-03-09T14:36:00.000-07:00

"There comes a time when every life goes off course. In this desperate moment you must choose your direction. Will you fight to stay on the path while others tell you who you are? Or will you label yourself? Will you be honored by your choice? Or will you embrace your new path? Each morning you choose to move forward or to simply give up."

"There comes a time when every life goes off course. In this desperate moment who will you be? Will you let down your defenses and find solace in someone unexpected? Will you reach out? Will you face your greatest fears bravely or move forward with faith? Or will you succumb to the darkness in your soul?"

---Lucas Eugene Scott; One Tree Hill.

One Tree Hill have inspired me so much. It taught me about life-- be strong, don't give up that easily. It all seems hard and so, complicated. But if you try harder, work harder, put bit by bit, pieces by pieces together. It will, seem, somewhat much easier. In this life, we face so much, so so much moments that hurt us, confuse us, bring us down. Someone we love can dissapear in our life in an blink of an eye. A minute, so much can happen. People say, " Hey, That's life." We can go through it, face it strongly. We don't give up when we can't get what we want, don't lose hope when we lose someone. A quote by One Tree Hill that means so much: There are moments in our lives when we find ourselves at a crossroads. Afraid. Confused. Without a roadmap. The choices we make in those moments can define the rest of our days.
Of course, when faced with the unknown, most of us would rather turn around and go back.
But once in awhile people push on to something better-something found just beyond the pain of going it alone and just beyond the bravery and courage it takes to let someone in. Or to give someone a second chance.
Something beyond the quiet persistence of a dream.
Because it's only when you're tested that you discover who you truly are. And it's only when you're tested that you discover who you can be. The person you want to be does exist, somewhere on the other side of hard work, faith and belief, and beyond heartache and fear of what lies ahead." Life is like a road, If you give up, You'll be miserable. In this case, my word is Stuck there forever. If you choose to move on, the right path, make the best out of your life, spend time with the people you love, the people you should spend time with, have fun with your friends, cause' you know memories with your friends are the one that you would really really miss. Life can be difficult at times, Life can make us stop at one moment and make us afraid, it simply make us do not know what to do. In this life, you play it like a game. Move on when someone bring you down. Push all the people that bring you down, out from your life. Life can be a bitch, but try to love it. You'll learn to appreciate it day by day when you know what exactly life means.

-P/s: G. I tried posting up the pictures of us that night. I don't think Posting Up Pictures works now. I'll try again later. (L) you!

GoodMorning Beautiful.
Start your day with a cheesy song, Sing!

2008-03-02T20:54:00.000-08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MARK JAY PAMINTUAN! :D

Friends-Forever:)
<3you!

2008-03-01T03:45:00.000-08:00

So I will be strong.

No, I won't give up.

2008-02-23T20:29:00.000-08:00

I, actually missed French class on Friday. I was terribly sick, and i had and still have the sexiest voice ever. Flu, running nose, cold- complete. If you get what I'm trying to say. I had lot in my mind recently, Friends-- Family. Practically, everything.

How are you doing, abang? I hope you're doing better than I am.

How are you doing, zim? I've been missing you terribly.
How are you doing, buyan? Haven't receive any kisses on the cheeks from you lately.

What happened to the life I used to love? The life before I turned twelve. The time before everything I love suddenly disappear. The time before life forces me to grow up. The time when all I do is just make friends. Make a group of enemies and in the end, they become my friends. The time when I used to tell the whole class not to be friends with one girl that I dislike. The time when I used to be mean, and nobody cared. The time when i used to be the one who complains about everything. The time when I used to think everything around me is safe. The time when I never leave Abang's or Kaka's side. The time when I had birthday parties, and call only "good" friends over, to play with the best Barbie doll. The time when I cried was only because mom scolded me. The time when I didn't know what getting hurt was. The time when I wake up on mum's side. The time when my grandma packed food for school. The time when I had to share one big room with kaka. The time when we used to keep our tiniest littlest secret together. Cutting doll's hair at the back of our room. The time when abang and me fought over who gets the computer first. The time when abang used to bully aunty Suliati with a fake snake and running around the house laughing, or the time when abang run around the house with a big fire-paper on his hand. The time when I used to throw ten cents in the river of ugama school and making one wish. I miss that life. I miss my childhood. Growing up.. is just so hard. I did more and more bad things that I regretted in my teenage life, things I can't forgive myself- hurt the people around me.Hurting by keeping it to myself- or confessing. Not stopping the people I'm suppose to stop. Lie to people who shouldn't be lied to. Cry over things I shouldn't cry over. What happened to my life? Life seems to actually-- disappear, day by day.

2008-02-21T06:33:00.000-08:00

A friend is someone who remembers what you did for them after years of being friends. A friend, never forgets you, or abandoned you for his/her girlfriend/boyfriend. Who never leaves you out, or make you walk at the back, or ignores you, who will never forgot, " who have been there for me when I'm down. When I need a shoulder. To cheer me up." Cause when you lost your friends, you'll have nothing left. Like they say, Love comes and go, But friends stay with you.. forever. But I don't think they want to even 'stay' with you, if you treat them like shiiiii. A friend is someone, who also, doesn't mind you calling them names, like how you used to call each other before they even were in a relationship. Just be careful- choose wisely. You can have both, but handle with care. Cause once you lose one, you'll lose all. In the end, you know who your true friends are. And you'll regret it, cause damn, damn- it's useless to even cry about it. Now.. that you have nothing else.

and sure, you already lose me as your friend;
So think about it.

2008-02-16T19:25:00.000-08:00

Latest:

Thursday; I went over to Lester's for Chinese New Year. Zaeem and Adeline picked me up at about almost 8, and we watched dodge ball for.. 3 seconds in the car? lol. Cause lester lives right infront of my Simpang. It was fun, eventhough i was bad ( really bad! ) at giving directions. AlThough, there's no drinking or big gambling, it was superb. But yeah, people gambled. I like the food, rubs tummy! hahahaha. not posting up lots of pictures cause there's hundreds of em' : ) this would be enough.

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Friday; night. Abdul brought me to empire. Dinner at pantai, along with mumma bubah, benny and kaka : ) It was his treat so it's all goood. Too bad I didn't take pictures of fooods. hahahaha. It looks TASTY! It's really tasty i tell you ! wait.. i've been eating out two days straight. lol. Fatty ! Abdul's friends came too, but they sat at another table. I remember: Azim, Mizi, Izhar, Ali and.. (?) :/ Not posting up alot of pictures (as usual. :p )

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..And, Last night; Saturday. Nazura invited me to Polo for reception party ( Abby's Wedding. ) The newlyweds are (Y) awesome! Everyone look bright and be-hu-ti-ful. Me and Pesh, ofcourse one of the loudest-high-looking-girls there in the beginning. Nazura was really pretty, Princess Jasmine:) hahahaha. I sat one table with Pesh, Nazura, Bils & Jo. Last night, was, in Pesh's word: "The Bombdigity."

Helllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllo!

2008-02-14T20:44:00.000-08:00

Two BEST boys you wouldn't want to lose. :)

2008-02-14T02:26:00.001-08:00

Yes, the chocolates are all in my tummy, nyummy nyummy : ) here's whats left for valentine.

Off to Lester's. Zaeem's picking me up ! :D Bye.

2008-02-12T02:14:00.000-08:00

zaimah. {pupapoe. says:
i so love you: )

nathan johnson says:
RAWRRR I love you too.

you know; sometimes you can get what you want if..
you try a little bit harder : )


	6470818671 At this moment there is 6 billion 4 hundred and 70 million, 8 hundred, 18 thousand, 6 hundred and 71 people in the world. Some are running scared, Some are coming home, Some tell lies to make it through the day, Others just aren't facing the truth, Some are evil men at war with good, and some are good struggling with evil. 6 billion people. 6 billion souls, and sometimes all you need is one.

X0;

2008-02-06T07:10:00.000-08:00

Updates:

Two days ago:

I went over to Jia Chee's house, along with Li Chien and Serene Seah. And met her two huge yet so cute dogs. I didn't take pictures of them though cause it kept on chasing me. Bricky and Bobo. Bobo kept on jumping on me. And i look insanely retarded and shout here and there. lol. But sorry Jia Chee I wasn't able to play with them and you shouldn't slap your Bobo again. hahahaha. Chien flew off to Malaysia yesterday gor chinese new year. :(

Happy Chinese New Year!

Today:

I got bored of school and went home. Bridgette went home too. And along with Brice and Ryan plus Adeline too, i guess :) hahaha. I walked out of the class at eleven. Half of form fours didn't come to school. Mum said it was alright to go home, so i did. And oh em gee. i so do not like Malay class today. The teacher kept saying I was talkative when all i do was rest my head on the table. I swear. She wanted the class to vote whether I was talkative or not. God. But somehow, my classmates were the bomb, nobody voted that i am a talkative type of girl. lol. So sarcastic. Lots of drama in school lately. But I'm not going to mention it here.

Tonight:

I went out to the oh so where people is attracted- gadong. I'm too lazy to mention the whole thing down. so maybe next time? :)

XO;

2008-02-02T22:52:00.000-08:00

It is so weird how everything started to change, suddenly. Day by day, minute by minute, second by second. Maybe it's just the stage of growing up, or maybe it's just the way it is. I miss how you would always whisper and say, look at that, look at her, look at him, and start laughing. Or when the time you text me when i am so down, when i have no one to run to. And when we were so close, like sisters. But in a glance, everything changed. From the top, to the bottom. It's like both of us are writing a new page, a new chapter of our own. Though things aren't like the past-- But somehow, i miss you.

2008-02-02T22:28:00.000-08:00

Them; ilove.

This is my G and J.

Mark Jay the star.

Chien, G and JC.

Kawan Good.

Them all, and SereneSeah.

2008-02-01T02:56:00.000-08:00

So, yes. School started, a month ago. Well, yes-- it's school ! It could be boring, hell boring at times. But, I'm trying to make the best of it. With my girls and boys in it. Nothing can beat them :) I've been busy with studying, two hours of dance in the afternoon, netball ( no more. ) and basketball. And I know I haven't been updating my blog, and posting pictures. Sorry. I'm taking Eng Lit, are you interest in taking them too? Let me know. For year 10, only though. There are bunch of new movies too. Who's up to go out with me? Don't hesitate, I need an interesting February, since all my best friends will be flying off for Chinese New Year.

Happy Advance Chinese New Year. :D

And I'm taking part in the Francophonie too:) It's a French thing. It's for the French people. Well, if you can make it and watch me, do come! It's on the 12th of March, in Maktab Sains, probably. Though I will be dress in a fancy funny hippy way because I'm doing a play for em'. lol. But I can't wait. It's gon be fuuny, I promise you. Alex, Asha and Tharindhu will be doing the play with me.

And to Badul: Sorry I haven't been answering your call. Please text me before you call. I always missed your call. And it's always cause I'm out. I don't hear the phone ring in my pocket, Or I'm taking a bath, my phone is not by my side. But, Sorry!

SO, update me people. I haven't heard any single thing from anyone. And moreover, Zim is flying off to Johor soon. :( I'll miss you, so so much. I've got homeworks and studdying to do. I'll post up something later, no promises. I'll update soon.

Goodnight.

2008-01-17T04:16:00.001-08:00

i. am. back-from. kuala lumpur. i-miss-kl :( and the chinese boys are so god damn wow.

2008-01-17T04:02:00.000-08:00

A Beautiful Lie says:
hhahahaha ok ok yeah u look "pretty"

zaimah. {crapfukahoe. says:
yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay.

i so love Mark Jay! :D

2008-01-02T22:32:00.000-08:00

Girl : Too bad you fell for that? Actually, too bad he is just too plain stupid to not think that there's a girl who love him so.

Boy: You just lost her. Why not leave her alone for now ? You've done lot to hurt her. So please don't pill up more shits for her.

AND P/S: If you can't handle what you can't handle. Just let it go. Getting off isn't the best way to run away from something.

She is used to this. All this.
I love you, kz.

2008-01-02T22:23:00.000-08:00

Some people just don't appreciate what they have already got.

2007-12-30T18:54:00.000-08:00

You had pretty black hair which brushed against your fair skin, along with your beautiful eyes. You were young, pretty and beautiful. Describe as a bright girl, bright future. Sitting down at the canteen to eat with your friends, and giving them a hand when they were bullied, "Are you okay?" - All the words that came out from your friends mouth, from their heart, really made me cry terribly. You seemed such a wonderful friend, I know you are and will always be. We would always remember the day when each and every one of us had our heads down with tears rolling down our cheek and prayed for you. Life isn't fair sometimes, it's hard to forget that day, your friends will always keep the good memories you built together and never will forget it, they will always remember when the time they had you to run to, a shoulder to cry on, a friend to cheer them up and Yes, They are blessed to have a friend like you. Because everyone loves you, they do, You mean the world to them. Even though I never got the chance to get to know you, I hope you're in a better place now, safe in God's hand. I hope you're happy over there. You were just so young when you left your friends, It was just an accident, everyone knew that, day and night they cried but I'm sure you have forgiven them. I know you gave your life to your other best friend, Adele, who is still here with us, who is saved from that tragedy . But they knew this wasn't a good bye for them, it's more to "see you again, soon. wait for me. " You have been such a kind hearted, honest, loyal, terrific and trustworthy friend / daughter / bestfriend / cousin, etc. You have taught alot to your friends. You were inspired by most teachers and friends. Nevertheless, You will always be remembered. You will always be a piece of each and every one. You will always be loved. You will always stay in our heart. You will always be a part of everyone's life. We will always pray for you, Hear us.

I'm sure you're up there watching over your friends.
Everyone misses you.

--In loving memory, late Vivian Chow.

who was just about to turn 12.

♥

2007-12-30T18:46:00.000-08:00

Tout est allé terrible aujourd'hui. Ce qui est venu de sa bouche, à pratiquement presque tout, maintenant.

Merci beaucoup. Vous ne devriez pas avoir apporté que vous avez dit.

Find out what it means, and you'll know how pissed I am.

2007-12-30T15:00:00.000-08:00

If you be my star.

I'll be your sky.

2007-12-30T14:58:00.000-08:00

I'm sick, almost dying. But don't worry, still alive.

post will be up soon.
Any last words? :)

2007-12-28T22:55:00.000-08:00

Accidently in love.

you suck (o:
;go waddle.

2007-12-28T10:17:00.000-08:00

Give me a flower hat.

Swing me on a swinging tyre :)

2007-12-25T13:49:00.000-08:00

Hawu Sunshine.For the last fourteen years. I never believe that I can live with someone as amazing as you. As great as you. As wonderful as you. You taught me how to live my life. You show me what's right and wrong in live. What's safe and what's danger. You taught me how not to fall. Showed me the right path. Showed me how not to be afraid of anything. You are the reason why my life still goes on. The reason why I didn't commit suicide when I was 9. The reason why I didn't have just stab myself with a knife. Now, explain to me. What would life be without you? Would I ever be able to say goodbye? Would I ever be happy when you're not around? Would I be able to move on? Would I be able to see you walk away?

Weak? No, she is god damn strong. You say you're weak, but deep down, you're Strong. I know you are, and I am proud of you, because you made me believe that I am strong enough to face life. All the tears, unhappy moments, crestfallen feelings, painful life you've been through. You still have the courage to be there for me. To be a shoulder to cry on. To be there when I wake up. To smile to when you walk around the house. To be mad at for using/taking my things.nTo choke on my tears. To laugh with. To be there when i needed someone to run to. To be the only one who understands my words. And.. To be a perfect amazing sister to me. If I have my last wish from God, It'll be, "To always make my sister happy." Never letting you walk out of my life.I never did show I love you, I never say I love you as much as you say it to me. I never said I love you when you cry. In my prayers, is to love you now and always. I love you.

Face it, If you weren't part of my life, I wouldn't have any one to say this to:
"Ka, are you okay?"
"Ka, tell me what's wrong."
"Why are you crying?"
"Ka mau makan?"
"Ka ambilkan.. love you."
"wake up kakaps!"
"gooooooood morning!"
"ka, menagapa aku cematu?"
"ka. ka. KA?"

There wouldn't be the word kaka in my life. No one to joke with, to laugh with, to make fun of, to bully, to smile to in the morning, to sleep with at night, to say goodnight to before i sleep, to go everywhere like a tail, to tell who I like .So, thank you for being my other half, a part of my life, my pillar of strength, my life, and to complete the missing piece.

"I'll love you forever,
I'll like you as always.
As long as I'm living,
my sister you'll be."
♥

2007-12-25T13:16:00.000-08:00

Hello moon, you are beautiful tonight!

The people I miss:
♥Nathan Johnson.
♥Tey Li Chien.
♥ Nazura Shahri.
♥ Nafisah Halim.
♥ Abdul Mubdi.
♥ Haadi Putera.
♥ Tayib Abds.
♥ Farzanah.
♥Abdul Mubdi.
♥Azim Ghani.
♥Tee A.
♥Mozie A.
♥ Akeem.
♥Natacia.
♥3R! (evv-one!)

Did I miss your name out? I hope not. Because you know I miss each and everyone of you.
And I really can't wait for school;
Friends.

2007-12-25T13:04:00.000-08:00

Saw Azim Ghani today, but He didn't see me.

Today, was somewhat amazing. Just if i exclude all my mother's yelling. We went out, yes. Afternoon, Dinner and Movie. And i don't have tons of pictures. Just got the ones in the car. The battery went god damn flat. Our random, insane, drunk, retarded, etc moments. And again, not going details.

Need I say, more?

It's 5:11am, and I haven't been sleeping early lately.It's insane.
"Boring ni nada Nazura, OMG OMG OMG!"-fifi.
Nazura flew off to Dubai today :(

2007-12-25T12:58:00.000-08:00

"Look what my camera can do!"

can yours do that, too? :)

This is my sister. My better-half.The reason why my life is still going on :)

2007-12-24T21:52:00.000-08:00

Merry Christmas.

It's all about Santa, mistle toe, tip toe kisses, stockings, presents and;
Best of all, candy cane!

and a letter to North pole.

"AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!"

2007-12-23T19:02:00.000-08:00

I like the sound of rain dripping on the rooftop in early mornings.
I like pouring rain.
When i sleep.

Thank you for the rain this morning.

Don't fade the memories away, dear God.

2007-12-23T11:52:00.000-08:00

-You don't know how much I care.
-You don't know how much I cried.
-You don't know how much it hurts.
-You don't know how much I love you.
-You don't know how much I miss you.
-You don't know how much I give a damn.
-You don't know how much i crave for you.
-You don't know how much I think about you.
-You don't know how much i talked about you.
-You don't know how much you make me smile.
-You don't know how much you make me laugh.
-You don't know how much time i waited for you.
-You don't know how much you mean the world to me.
-You don't know how much I wanted to talk to you today.

You don't know how much more;

about me&you.

Today.. you broke my heart.
It's killing me inside,your pm.

Thank you.

"You make me feel this way, today.

:'(

2007-12-23T10:17:00.000-08:00

A quote by Nafisahtul Munawarah, " you've got only one boy to impress! .. Nathan! "

i strongly agree.

Today, was awesome. Spent the day with Nazura, Fifi and her boyfriend at Empire. Played "Flying Fish", and fell twice. But, afterall the hectic hours, i had FUN. Not going in details. Took tons of pictures, but I am just going to post a little up :)

"If life can always be this.. beautiful."

XOXO.

Butch Walker.

2007-12-22T09:52:00.000-08:00

What if life gives you just one more day to live. What would you.. do?

AND..

Would you have the courage to tell your loved ones?

Hey There Dellilah.

2007-12-21T21:05:00.000-08:00

This is dedicated to the world.
Inspiring stories.
Isn't too hectic to read.
Not the best, But worth reading.

*

Jenny was so happy about the house they had found.
For once in her life it was on the right side of town.
She unpacked her things with such great ease.
As she watched her new curtains blow in the breeze.

How wonderful it was to have her own room.
School would be starting; she'd have friends over soon.
There d be sleep-overs, and parties; she was so happy
It s just the way she wanted her life to be.

On the first day of school, everything went great.
She made new friends and even got a date!
She thought, "I want to be popular and I'm going to be,
Because I just got a date with the star of the team!"

To be known in this school you had to have a clout,
And dating this guy would sure help her out.
There was only one problem stopping her fate.
Her parents had said she was too young to date.

"Well, I just won't tell them the entire truth.
They won't know the difference; what's there to lose?"
Jenny asked to stay with her friends that night.
Her parents frowned but said, "All right."

Excited, she got ready for the big event.
But as she rushed around like she had no sense,
She began to feel guilty about all the lies,
But what's a pizza, a party, and a moonlight ride?

Well the pizza was good, and the party was great,
But the moonlight ride would have to wait.
For Jeff was half drunk by this time.
She felt someone remove her from the twisted rubble

And heard, call an ambulance!
These kids are in trouble!
Voices she heard...a few words at best.
But she knew there were two cars involved in the wreck.

Then wondered to herself if Jeff was all right,
And if the people in the other car was alive.
She awoke in the hospital to faces so sad.
"You ve been in a wreck and it looks pretty bad."

These voices echoed inside her head,
As they gently told her that Jeff was dead.
They said "Jenny, we've done all we can do.
But it looks as if we ll lose you too."

"But the people in the other car!? "Jenny cried.
"We re sorry, Jenny, they also died."
Jenny prayed, "God, forgive me for what I've done
I only wanted to have just one night of fun."

"Tell those people's family, I've made their lives dim,
And wish I could return their families to them."
"Tell Mom and Dad I m sorry I lied,
And that it's my fault so many have died.

"Oh, nurse, won't you please tell them that for me?"
The nurse just stood there-she never agreed.
But took Jenny s hand with tears in her eyes.
And a few moments later Jenny died.

A man asked the nurse, "Why didn t you do your best?"
To bid that girl her one last request?"
She looked at the man with eyes so sad.
"Because the people in the other car were her mom and dad."

You never know if Jenny, could be.. us.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

They.. can mean the world to us.

"

A mother held her new baby and very slowly rocked him back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. And while she held him, she sang: